I know I do. Lately it seems like the fraud protection police have a special satellite precinct in my thoughts just to manufacture doubts and fears about my qualification to serve my unique life purpose.
People like to say there are three sides to every story – your side, their side and the truth. I imagine this is also true when you think about who you are. There is how you appear to yourself, how others perceive you, and the truth. I’ve noticed it isn’t really about when other people question my authenticity or integrity. Basic inquiries are a part of life and I’m learning generally not to be offended or angered by them because they usually aren’t about me anyway. It’s just those Internal Fraud Alerts that really get me. Boy do they know how to stop me in my tracks!
No matter how much energy, effort, and training I place into being well prepared, I have this worry about not being capable enough, not being real enough, not being good enough – being a fraud. The more I achieve, the louder this voice has grown over the years.
As if one day someone will pull back the curtain and the great and powerful Oz will be exposed- as human! [Gasp! Hey wait, aren’t we all human anyway? What’s the big deal?] The fraud alerts are typically about the difference between who we think we are and who we get tricked into thinking we “SHOULD” be. How often to you have thoughts like
- Who in the world do I think I am to do/create/share this?
- They will probably not want to hear this from me because I’m too [insert random distinction].
- What makes me think I should be doing this?
- Maybe someone else should be the one to step up.
- What if they find out that I am actually – or not actually [insert random human quality] too!
This internal fraud alert is always false. ALWAYS! Besides, if you are like me and look behind your own curtain there’s a whole lot more there than just smoke and mirrors. There is a whole warehouse full of experience, preparation, talent, blood, sweat, and tears. The things we live through play a role in shaping who we are and what makes us so unique to our purpose.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?
– Marianne Anderson, A Return to Love
The very fact that you are who you are makes you EXACTLY the right person for that purpose, that gift, that calling. The fraud alert usually sounds as I am allowing my unique light to shine by stepping into a bigger version of my unique purpose. If I am thinking of showing a new level of transparency or imperfection, my fraud alert runs wild.
Your ego likes to keep you in your comfort zone playing small. The ego unleashes this fraud alert as you are stepping into a larger portion of your purpose. It uses your deepest doubts and fears about who you are or how powerful you can be against you. The higher the stakes, the louder the alert. Your ego knows exactly what spot to hit to bring up your fears and defenses. I might be the only one, but my fraud alert has even gone as far as to attack someone else’s credibility or interests to keep me playing small.
Remember, this internal fraud alert is always false. ALWAYS!
This week I want to challenge you to pay attention to your fraud alert.
- When does your fraud alert sound?
- How does it serve as a signal to you?
- What is your regular reaction to your fraud alert?
- Is there another choice of responses and which one serves your highest and most powerfully authentic self?
- What do you notice about your thoughts based on how you handle a fraud alert?
- What are you learning about how you see yourself based on your fraud alert?
If you are getting a bit nervous, bored, or even defensive reading those questions, congratulations! Your fraud alert is already kicking in. Will you do this challenge for this week?
I hope so!
Love, Peace, & Happiness,
Adrienne, the Soul Power Coach™